


Sing for Yourself

by StarflowerSea



Category: ARGONAVIS from BanG Dream! AAside (Video Game)
Genre: Gen, Ignition - Freeform, Performance, composition, happy birthday nayuta
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-15
Updated: 2020-09-15
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:07:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,625
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26474665
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarflowerSea/pseuds/StarflowerSea
Summary: Nayuta Birthday 2020While trying to compose a new song for GYROAXIA, Nayuta comes to terms with feelings he had once burned away.
Comments: 8
Kudos: 25





	Sing for Yourself

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [re-ignited.](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26397511) by [starryline](https://archiveofourown.org/users/starryline/pseuds/starryline). 



> Hey, everyone! This was meant to be my birthday fic to Nayuta; however it ended up taking a bit longer than I anticipated, for which I sincerely apologize. Regardless, I hope you all enjoy it!  
> As always, comments are appreciated!

Nayuta clenched his teeth with a frustrated growl as he crumpled up yet another piece of paper and hurled it against the wall. The pen in his hand snapped as he slammed his hands onto the table, ignoring his stinging palms as he panted.

Why was this so hard?

Nayuta dug his fingernails into his skin as he curled his hands into fists so tight his fingers cramped. His head spun as he shook himself off, drops of sweat falling to soak the wood below.

Such a waste…

“Nayuta.”

Nayuta turned to find Kenta standing at the door to his room, a cup of coffee in hand.

“What do you want?” Nayuta growled.

“You’ve been working for the past four hours nonstop.” Walking into the room, Kenta placed the cup on Nayuta’s desk. “I made you some lemon coffee, figuring you’d be in here.”

Nayuta snatched the cup and drained it in one gulp, the still-hot coffee scorching his throat. He slammed the cup on the table and gulped again, biting back a grimace as his throat continued to burn. Burning, like the fire raging inside of him.

Kenta only looked on with a concerned expression. “You should take a break. Working like this won’t do you any good.”

"I'm fine," Nayuta retorted as he looked away. Kenta could see through him far too well. How irritating.

“How about you go for a walk? Maybe the fresh air will do you good—"

“Don’t tell me what to do."

Gritting his teeth, Nayuta turned on his heel and stalked out of the room, leaving Kenta behind. He swept through the sharehouse without as much as a glance at the others. Shoving the door open, Nayuta stepped out into the stifling afternoon air.

The sun bore down on Nayuta as he made his way through the streets, the constant chirp of cicadas driving through his skull. What worse time to be outside – what was Satozuka thinking?

No matter. There was no time for such thoughts.

Even as he berated himself for it, hie mind continued to veer deeper into the smoldering coals he hid deep inside him. Those feelings – to dig into them was to dig up nearly unbearable pain and vulnerability – something he didn’t know if he was ready for.

Pain was something he was used to his whole life. All those wounds he had accumulated since the very beginning, when his father hammered him with those words – useless, weak, good for nothing – and abandoned him and his mother to their own devices, all because of Nayuta’s illness. He had set fire to those wounds, burned and charred them until they seemed like nothing. Before long, his entire self was cloaked in a raging flame that burned everything to ash. For the entirety of his life, Nayuta only aimed for the top in his quest for revenge – his voice was his sword, his flames his shield. Ruthlessly he tore through anything that stood in his path towards that goal, no matter who they were.

That was, until he met Ren Nanahoshi.

From the beginning, something in Ren’s singing reached through the flames and ensnared Nayuta’s heart. Though raw and untrained, that sound shook Nayuta to his core – even more so with the rest of Argonavis backing him. Listening to their songs, it was as if a tsunami was crashing through him, all but dousing the fire and leaving his scorched self bare and vulnerable. It was such a painful feeling that Nayuta rose against it, searching desperately for a way to regain what was swept away. Every time he heard Re's voice since then, he was left stunned and floundering, at a loss for words.

It was frustrating. So, so frustrating.

How was it that Ren could rise so easily, while Nayuta had to fight tooth and nail to get to where he was?

Those questions and feelings swirled within Nayuta’s mind, the already humid air seeming to thicken even further as sharp waves of anger roiled through his gut. How did such feelings come so easily to Ren, and yet…

Nayuta scoffed as he shook his head. All of this was leading him nowhere. It was best he just burn it all and start over.

As Nayuta halted at an intersection, he gazed up at the sky. The sun shone so bright that it hurt his eyes, yet he didn’t turn away. A cool breeze ruffled his hair gently, bringing some relief from the heat. Before long they would leave Sapporo behind and move to Tokyo, where their new lives would begin. From there the path before them was clear – as always, charge forward to the top, burning through anything in their way.

Yet something about the scenery now seemed different – it seemed a touch…lonelier, almost. Something within Nayuta shifted as he continued to squint at the sun before finally lowering his gaze, blinded. Whatever it was, it was a near-foreign concept for Nayuta to grasp.

Shaking his head, Nayuta continued walking, memories of Argonavis filtering through the noise. Performing with Ren during their battle of the bands. Watching Argonavis’s livestream of Starry Line. Calling Ren to the stage at the Destiny Rock Festival and listening to Argonavis perform in front of a thunderous crowd. All of those memories seemed to converge into a shifting mirage that continuously wavered in Nayuta’s mind, shimmering like the heated air.

As much as Nayuta loathed to admit it, he owed some gratitude to Ren – and the rest of Argonavis by extension – to awakening him to a new form of music and being. Though it grated against everything Nayuta had used music for – as a weapon to cleave the way forward – it opened a new path forward that he could take.

A new path…

Nayuta stiffened as something flitted to life within him. This song, too, could be seen as a new path forward. A song dedicated to the path that Ren and the rest of Argonavis had shown him. But most of all, it was a song dedicated to himself and his own journey.

Jaw clenched in determination, Nayuta turned and started back toward the sharehouse, his mind churning with ideas.

He barged in without a word and swept to his room, where he took up his pen without a word and dove in. Even though at times it was painful, he continued to dig deeper into those memories, holding them, examining them as he wrote. On into the night and the next morning he worked, pressing on even as the sun rose over the horizon. No matter what, he would prove to the world his resolve towards music, and towards himself. He would walk on this path with his head held high, with no regrets left behind.

* * *

“This is the new song?”

Nayuta watched with arms folded as Kenta looked over the sheet music.

After a moment, Kenta looked over at Nayuta with a smile. “Exceptional, as always.”

A quiet scoff escaped Nayuta’s lips even as he gave a tiny nod. “Let’s get to rehearsing immediately. We have no time to waste.”

“About that, I have a request.”

“Hah?”

“I’d like to invite Argonavis to watch us.”

Argonavis? Was Satozuka crazy?

“It’d be a good learning experience for both of us, I think,” Kenta continued as he pushed his glasses up over his nose. “If anything, I can tell that you had them in mind when you wrote this song, didn’t you?”

Nayuta stiffened, eyes narrowed. “What makes you say that?”

“Just a hunch.”

Nayuta averted his gaze as he clenched a fist. “Whatever. Let’s go.”

To his exasperation, Kenta nodded with a smile. “Alright. I’ll invite them over.”

“Who said you could—” Nayuta cut himself off as he saw Kenta already typing away. Sighing, he turned towards the studio. “Five minutes.”

“Got it.”

Nayuta stepped into the studio to see the others already set up and tuning. He gave them a cursory glance before walking over to the microphone and grabbing it off the stand. Just as he was about to speak Kenta walked into the room.

“Argonavis is on their way. They’ll be here in approximately fifteen minutes.”

So they’re actually coming.

“Get ready,” Nayuta retorted.

Kenta simply nodded in response as he went to his spot and grabbed his guitar. Nayuta squeezed the microphone even harder, already feeling his fingers cramp and lock. He had to do this, no matter what.

“Let’s get started. _MANIFESTO.”_

With that GYROAXIA jumped in immediately, as swift and ruthless as always. Nayuta forced all his power into his voice, raw and sharp as it pierced the air. The others followed along, their instrumentals similarly grating and rough as they burned through the air.

Song after song they tore through without rest with sharp, agonizing precision. Every single note was laced with cold, ruthless flame, a flame that filled and burned everything. Even as Nayuta halted them (and himself) to snap for the smallest mistakes, they continued to soldier on. It was how they had always done it.

As they were winding down _REVOLUTION,_ there was a knock on the door. Confused, everyone save for Nayuta glanced at each other.

“Seems like they’re here,” Kenta said.

“Excuse us,” came a timid voice from outside the door. Nayuta looked up, squeezing the mic.

Out of the corner of his eye, Kenta nodded. “Come in.”

The door opened as Ren walked in, the rest of Argonavis behind him. Both bands stared at each for a full minute, neither sure of what to say.

Nayuta stared into Ren’s eyes, studying him. So he had arrived.

Next to Ren Yuto shifted his weight nervously, looking clearly uncomfortable. Nayuta cast a quick glance at Yuto before returning his attention to Ren.

“Um…We’re sorry for intruding.” The tension in the room shattered as Ren spoke up, his voice quiet.

“Don’t worry about it,” Kenta replied. “You came in right on time.”

Nayuta blinked. In time for what?

“We heard of a new song from Aniki and were invited over.” The red-haired young man flanking Ren’s left nodded towards Kenta.

Wait. Did that mean—

Nayuta turned on Kenta without a second thought, striding up to him furiously. “What did you tell them that for?!”

To his further rage, Kenta simply faced Nayuta down with his signature cool gaze. “As I said before, I figured it would be a good learning experience for Argonavis and GYROAXIA both.”

Nayuta could only scoff before turning away. “Fine.”

“Nayuta-kun?” Ren’s voice dragged Nayuta’s attention towards Argonavis.

Nayuta simply drew in a silent breath and gripped the microphone, gazing straight at Argonavis.

“This is our new song: _IGNITION.”_

Immediately the warmth of the other instruments bloomed around Nayuta, bathing him in flame. But compared to the other songs, this flame was gentler and warmer. So too was his voice as it carried through the air, even though he sang with the same mindset he always did. Singing like this felt strange, but not unwelcome.

As they continued playing, the rest of Argonavis gazed at them in wide-eyed awe. It was clear this wasn’t what they were expecting.

Nayuta’s voice rose as they reached the chorus, where he found himself singing with all his heart. A bizarre feeling rushed through him, as if he was connecting to the others through his performance.

_“Sing for yourself.”_

As those three words rang through the air, Nayuta locked eyes with Ren, as if singing directly to him. Gazing into Ren’s eyes was like gazing into a field of stars, bright as the fire that burned around them.

The song swept them away entirely, its warmth resonating and echoing through each of them. As Nayuta sang, he thought he felt a small smile flit across his lips. His chest felt oddly light, his heart weightless. Everything seemed to shine brighter than before as he swept his gaze around the room.

Was this what happiness felt like?

Nayuta stole a glance at the other members. Though they were all playing as they normally did, they seemed to shine brighter as well. Reon and Miyuki were smiling broadly as they played, while Kenta and Ryo, while more reserved, were smiling as well nonetheless. As Nayuta turned back to his audience, he noticed even they seemed to light up – Ren most of all.

Fueled by this newfound light, Nayuta sang with all of his heart, pouring his entire being into the music. The others seemed to respond in kind, their music swirling and pulsing as it filled the room. To sing such raw emotions was strange, almost frightening, and yet it was oddly refreshing in a way – though Nayuta would never admit to that. Together they pushed on with all their might, newfound hope and determination ringing through every chord and lyric, all the way to the very end.

Finally their last chords echoed into the air, leaving it thrumming even as silence again blanketed the room. Nayuta slowly lowered the mic, panting quietly.

“Wow…” Ren’s awed whisper reached Nayuta. “That was amazing!”

Nayuta was about to scoff, but something in him told him to hold back. Instead, he gave Ren the tiniest of nods. Something felt…different in him somehow.

Yuto shifted and adjusted his hat. “I admit, I've never expected this kind of song from you.”

“Thank you.” Kenta nodded politely at Argonavis. “This was a song that was written for—”

 _“Enough.”_ The temperature in the room dropped with that one word as Nayuta glared daggers at Kenta before turning away with a huff. “It’s simply a new song I wrote. Nothing more.”

“Still, it was really nice.” Again the warmth in Ren’s words reached Nayuta. “I could feel your emotions shine through!”

Nayuta bristled as his face flushed with uncomfortable heat. “Shut up.” Damnit – of all songs, why did it have to be this one?

And yet despite that, he couldn’t help but feel a hint of gratitude that his voice and his music were able to reach his rivals like this. He had shown his resolve – now it was time for Argonavis to show theirs.

“You’ve inspired me, Nayuta-kun.”

When Nayuta finally dared glance back at Ren, he was greeted by a gentle smile. “Thanks to this song, I feel I was able to understand you and the rest of GYROAXIA better. Thank you for playing it for us.”

Again Nayuta found himself at a loss for words. The sincerity in Nanahoshi’s voice always threw him off, every single time. And yet it was a part of why Nayuta found himself begrudgingly drawn to Nanahoshi. Shaken by that voice, Nayuta was driven to move forward, all up until this moment.

“That line – ‘Sing for yourself’ – what inspired that?”

“Hah?”

“I mean, it’s so…sincere and warm, coming from someone like you.” Ren tilted his head. “Somehow, something about it feels familiar.”

Of course he would eventually ask that.

Nayuta felt as if he were driven into a corner, his emotions lodged in his throat. He couldn’t even scoff, his stomach twisting into knots at the thought.

A tense silence stretched between them as Nayuta floundered for an answer. A glance out of the corner of his eye told him the rest of GYROAXIA had their gazes on him as well. Though it only frustrated him further, it made sense after all – as he was the one who wrote the song, only he would know its inspirations.

Nayuta stared down at the ground, clenching his jaw silently. What could he say? He could never admit that Argonavis inspired him in this way.

Finally, Nayuta raised his head again, locking eyes with Ren.

“The answer is right there.”

With that he brushed past them and walked out of the studio, thoughts swirling in his mind.


End file.
